What we leave behind……..


“Why did you do this for me?” Wilbur asked. ” I don’t deserve it. I’ve never done anything for you”….
“You have been my friend,” replied Charlotte….. “I wove my webs for you because I liked you….”

E.B. White
Charlotte’s Web

A friend stopped by yesterday and the conversation turned to our choice to leave our community and venture out into the world. She asked the question that has been asked by many over the last few months. “How can you leave your close network of friends?”

Some of the most endearing long term friendships are all around us.
I think of my mother and and my mother-in-law.

My mother had a life long friend who was her neighbor in Edmonton in 1952. They remained friends till my mother’s death in 2005. How often did they see each other? A total of 5 times after 1955. Do the math, folks. We grew up hearing news of Ruth and her family from Ontario that arrived in monthly letters and phone calls on special occasions.

My mom, Mabel on the right

Nel, my mother-in-law has a friend Tiny, who she left behind in Holland in 1952 when she crossed the big pond to Canada. They remain as close as sisters to this day. How many times have they physically seen each other since then? Count them on 2 hands. They know each others children, letters are written, phone calls made, tears shed. They have history that an ocean cannot erase.

Nel, my mother-in-law

I also have a friend that lives 3 hours away, who marched up and introduced herself to me in 1985. Barb who was then pregnant with her 3rd child, had some questions about childbirth and midwifery.
We became instant friends. I had the honor to attend the birth of Barb’s 4th boy, Kelan. Barb went on to become one of the most inspiring midwives I know. How often do we see each other? Not often. I hadn’t seen her since my mother’s funeral 5 years ago.
She reenters my life and it’s like no time has passed. We had the privilege of spending the day together, a few weeks ago. I marveled at how we had matured and changed, yet still remain connected through our friendship.

Barb and Marcel

I have a new friend, Amy, in Philadelphia, I met her through another friend, she needed a place to stay on her travels. We became fast friends. In three days we managed to create a bond that I feel will last a life time. Every Sunday we send images from our lives across the internet.

Amy and me

It is so easy to create the ties that bind us. Our beliefs become the master our thoughts.
Possibility seems to hard to fathom.
Every day we are tested by what we “believe” to be true.
Today, open yourself up to the possibility that what you think to be true may be a tie that binds you.

In friendship………..

5 thoughts on “What we leave behind……..

  1. Well said and absolutely agreed upon.
    As Winnie the Pooh said, “If there ever comes a day when we can’t be together keep me in your heart, I’ll stay there forever”

  2. Exactly! You might miss friends from not seeing each other frequently but the bond, the delight in sharing their lives/adventures, the connection is much stronger than being in physical proximity for long periods of time. Get out and do your thing and enrich us all by your news. Sorry, been AWOL with unbalanced work / stool legs, but that did not stop me thinking about you.

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